Do rope tops feel the same kind of euphoric catharsis as bottoms, or do they have another type of experience entirely?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n The answer my rigger sent back to my questions touched me so deeply it inspired me to seek answers from other rope lovers too; what attracts them to Shibari, and how do they experience tying or being tied?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n The responses I received were all stunning and unique, yet had many traits in common. Both tops and bottoms speak unanimously about entering a type of rope-space<\/em>; a mindset where few outside things seem to matter for the duration of the session. The riggers poetically describe feelings of intense focus and of tuning into their models to decipher their needs and wants. Models, on the other hand, overwhelmingly feel comforted and held while given the opportunity to let go.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e Hentie_Ropes <\/em><\/strong>(45) | Rope top\/rigger for 2 years, Berlin DE<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e I\u2019m a sensualist. A masochist. A Lover, object, goddess, and chattel. Whether I seek connection or introspection, both are possible. I\u2019m testing my boundaries while being held in my safe zone. I\u2019m sexual and asexual; either to varying degrees. I\u2019m meditative or resistant, primal or enlightened. I may fight or yield to whatever comes my way, and I don\u2019t have to decide until it happens. I\u2019m silly or stern, wholly immersed or playfully dancing on the surface. Approaching rope space,<\/em> I\u2019m a blank canvas and simultaneously a finished piece \u2014 and the eye of a good rigger sees the value in both.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Every facet of me can exist in this space, without judgment: When I\u2019m bound, I\u2019m all of me. In my entirety, I\u2019m as grateful for my body and mind as I could ever be. It\u2019s a deepened appreciation for what I hold within myself, and the allowance to let it breathe and expand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n What rope is to me, I cannot say, as I can\u2019t define something so contradictory. But, I know who I am, and that\u2019s why I keep returning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Tess Dagger<\/em><\/strong> (32) | 12 years rope experience, Bay Area US. Now in Berlin DE<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e Solmarius<\/em><\/strong> (45) | Rope top in training, Berlin DE<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e Blue-Lines<\/em><\/strong><\/a> (42) | Rope bottom, Berlin DE<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e I love ropes, for many reasons. Tying allows me to be fully present; to be firm, ensnare, and hold tight, to express my feelings, and also process darker emotions, like anger, in a healthy way. The rope runs like extensions of my arms, determining, but not demanding when the first line goes over the bamboo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The intimate yet familiar touches remind me of an octopus; slowly locking its prey in its arms. To symbolize this, I have a heart tattooed on my chest, held in place by tentacles, and, of course, ropes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Alex \/ <\/em><\/strong>Unkown Rigger<\/em><\/strong><\/a> (50) | Rigger for 9 years, Berlin DE<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e I find the resulting imagery stunning due to the coming together of these three elements; the rope, rigger, and bottom.<\/p>\n\n\n\n John<\/em><\/strong> (36) | Rigger and Dominant for 7+ years<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e Jeroen<\/em><\/strong> (29) | Rope bottom for 3 years, Mechelen BE<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e Alexahamartia<\/em><\/strong><\/a> (23) | Rope bottom for 5 years, Leeds UK<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e Aviv<\/em><\/strong> <\/em>\/ <\/em><\/strong>Dark Spring<\/em><\/strong><\/a> (39) | Ropes 15 years, suspensions for 1 year, Berlin DE<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e Ninola \/ <\/em><\/strong>Rope Unleashed<\/em><\/strong><\/a> <\/em><\/strong>| Rope top\/tying for 1.5 years, Berlin DE<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e Connecting through its nonverbal language provides an exclusive possibility to open a door to a unique world in a way few other things can. I\u2019ve always had a thing for languages, and when it comes to that of rope, there\u2019s a clarity and honesty to it that empowers me \u2014 one I want to dive deep into for the rest of my life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Kiwi Shibari<\/em><\/strong><\/a> (33) | Rope bottom for one year, Berlin DE<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e My artist loves the craft. My aesthete wants to see her<\/em> shine. My playful side always tries new things. My innermost reveals itself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n My sadist goes for crotch and waist. My voyeur loves to watch her breathe. My sensualist craves to see her tears. And me, I want to get us there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Doc Rope<\/em><\/strong><\/a> <\/em><\/strong>(46)<\/em> |<\/em><\/strong> Rope top for 8 years, Berlin DE<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u221e Dane <\/em><\/strong>(56) | Rope top for 4 years<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Maybe I\u2019m of the sentimental kind, or perhaps I\u2019m just extra emotional about rope these days, but, these lyrical descriptions have me a little teary-eyed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n How about you, have you tied or been tied? If so, what does it feel like for you? <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n If you haven\u2019t tried, would you like to?<\/strong> Check the link to our upcoming workshops<\/a> at SPNKD. If you\u2019re not in the area, you may reach out and ask us to help you find resources near you, and we\u2019ll do our best to help.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sincerely,<\/p>
\n\n\n\nEverything disappears \u2014 all but the model \u2014 and a special bond forms<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
I love to be immersed in my rope-space<\/em>. The moment I step in there I can focus my mind and stop thinking about what\u2019s happening around me. Everything disappears \u2014 all but the model \u2014 and a special bond forms; a symbiotic relationship based on mutual trust. The rope is my tool; a chisel with which I form figures that spring from my mind. Sculptural shapes emerge, composed not only from flesh and bone, but from sounds and gazes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nWhen I\u2019m bound, I\u2019m all of me<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
How do I define something which very definition is a thing of motion and fluidity? A better question is: Who am I in rope?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nA rare territory where body and mind are invited to insatiably receive fine pleasures<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
The growing sensual tension, the grace and elegance of it, the aesthetics, the sense of total but fusional abandonment, the revelation of surprising and infinite sensual creativity in apparent contrast with the unsophisticated rope; all this is a rare if not unmatched territory where body and mind are invited to insatiably receive fine, very fine<\/em>, pleasures.<\/p>\n\n\n\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/miro.medium.com\/max\/1400\/1*j_1MDtjI-N2yudq3utbZQQ.jpeg\")
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\n\n\n\nNothing ever touched me like the tight, warm embrace of ropes around my body; I instantly felt held and safe<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019ve tried so many different approaches to silencing my monkey mind; to see my true self and canalize the emotional and mental pain I sometimes feel. I got tattooed, started yoga and meditation, I messed around the city, and partied hard. I chose the path of excess. They all work in their own ways. But nothing ever <\/em>touched me as deeply as the tight, warm embrace of ropes around my body; I instantly felt held and safe like never before, or perhaps not since being unborn, back in my mother\u2019s womb \u2014 no kidding! I literally cried my heart out. It was an overwhelming, and some sort of spiritual moment. And, it was healing, for sure!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nYou can communicate through rope, without the use of words<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
When trust and a connection has been established, you can communicate through rope, without the use of words. As a rigger, you\u2019re on one hand opposite your partner, controlling them like a marionette, yet, you want to recognize their needs and lead them where they want to go. Doing this requires empathy and insight. This is why tying always looks different; it\u2019s the coming together of the bottom\u2019s desires with the perception and implementation of these by you, the top. It\u2019s similar to tango!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nI love the level of trust, communication, and closeness<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Apart from the construction and feel of the jute ropes themselves, I love the level of trust, communication, and closeness that emerge from tying. When I get into the headspace, I focus intensely on how the rope lays, forms, or confines the body, and then listen to cues from my model as to how to respond.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nA restricting, yet releasing, tight hug, that slows the mind<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Being bound and restricted feels like an escape from having to be in control of everything. It\u2019s as a restricting, yet releasing, tight hug, that slows the mind and brings me into subspace;<\/em> a place where there is no rush and no needs \u2014 just, simply being me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/miro.medium.com\/max\/1400\/1*kYVRLH97cOL3WEjEjbzIog.jpeg\")
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\n\n\n\nThe ropes carve a path down which I\u2019m allowed to escape my fears<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
I only feel fully alive once each of my nerves orchestrates a requiem of pain. I love the feeling of getting caught in a safety net of breathlessness as my conscious thoughts gasp for air; The way the tugs and scratches from the ropes carve a path down which I\u2019m allowed to escape my fears and shame; The way I\u2019m lifted, twisted, and held in love and care, bound to my skin. It\u2019s all too addictive to give up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nEvery session is a fairytale re-enacted to a blissful end<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
I grew up reading tales of knights in shining armor rescuing damsels in distress. The knights were always rewarded with eternal love and the couple lived happily ever after. For me, every rope suspension session is a fairytale re-enacted to a blissful end: A woman trusts me completely and reveals her deepest fantasies and vulnerabilities; she literally put her life in my hands. She knows that when the right moment comes, I\u2019ll be there to rescue her. Can you blame me for also being the monster who locked her up in the tower in the first place?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nTying makes me forget the world<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Tying makes me reach a flow-state, where I can forget the world for some seconds. I seek beauty in the connection and trust with others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nThe nonverbal language of shibari has clarity and honesty to it<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Rope is one of the main things making my life meaningful and fulfilled. To me, shibari is synonymous with letting go; releasing negative emotions, such as anger, fear, and doubt, to take a step back, center, and feel myself. I continuously witness this cathartic effect, both for riggers and models.<\/p>\n\n\n\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/miro.medium.com\/max\/1400\/1*GngbISdDTAEAjdypN1J2Vw.jpeg\")
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\n\n\n\nMy playful side always tries new things<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
I love how rope brings out many different sides of me:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nMy joy comes from knowing I\u2019ve met her needs, kept her safe, and brought her back<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
When I tie with my partner, my world narrows to this little space we\u2019re in; her breath, heartbeat, and littlest nods or twitches are all caught by my senses. Getting her to her place<\/em> is my goal every time; that place subs go when they let the rope hold them tight, secure, and they know they\u2019re in the safest place on earth where all they must do is be in the moment<\/em>. My joy comes from knowing I\u2019ve met those needs, kept her safe, and brought her back\u2014and that she trusts me enough to let me guide her. For that short time, the world around us doesn\u2019t exist. People may come and go, but I only hear and see her as she melts into my ropes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
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